Even though I have never biked more than 20 miles at one time I will be attempting to peddle 50 miles this weekend. The bay area is having a charity event “Bike for Breath” and it seemed motivational for me to jump into the ring and see what I can do. I figure even if I walk the entire way I will finish and it will be a fun experience. Who knows, maybe I will even get a t-shirt out of it. If I wanted to be like Lance I guess I could start shooting up and have no issues with taking the checkered flag or yellow. Those French people are yellow aren’t they? If I am completely debilitated afterwards I can sit at home and watch the love opera clippings from the new Sexual Potter movie.
I love saying that, Sexual Potter. Granted it is just a high school depiction of romance but still, this is Harry Potter right. Anyway, enough talk about Emma Watson. How many blogs in a row can be only about her? At some point people might think that I was becoming obsessed and with the book I am writing that would not be good. It is strange how many people cross over from fiction to reality, I mean from reality to fiction, well….not really sure what I mean. Suffice it to say that I am not becoming obsessed with any one specific girl (outside of my girlfriend) but instead am becoming obsessed with the depiction of them in my blogs. At some point I will either run out of words or run out of pictures or both.
Can’t say which will happen but as I sit here and write, the only woman I am truly obsessed with has just made my lunch for the day. How sweet is that? It is becoming increasingly difficult to remain jaded and sarcastic being so close to a woman who is so sweet and nice. Maybe I should ask her to lace my sandwich with hot peppers next time just to keep me on my toes. I can’t have my life going too smoothly. What would I possible do without huge hurdles to jump every day? Anyway back to the point. Biking. If anything does go wrong in my attempt this Saturday I can always blame North Korea. It seems that we are going to blame them for anything going wrong moving forward.
Would North Korea really attempt to hack our national computers in order to shut them down? Wouldn’t they just Nuke us? My guess is that our government is attempting to start a media campaign to prep the US citizens for an impending war with North Korea. Just remember in a few months when the bombs start flying, you heard it here first. All governments try and prep its citizens before invading another nation. Hahahaha, or maybe I am entering the zone of paranoia and nothing could be further from the truth. I actually think we should have blown up North Korea a long time ago.
Why go into Iraq and waste time in the desert. The real threat is those damn northern Yankees. If only we would have taken them out years ago. First things first. Too bad they are not true Yankee wannabees like the Mets. They would implode upon themselves and none of us would have to worry about them. Can anyone say New York is a one baseball team town?
Are North Koreans Catholics? That would explain a lot without having to analyze anything further. If they aren’t can’t we send some of those missionary people in their and convert them? A couple of high fives and repenting chants and we should be good to go.
